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Child of No God

by Derek Spaldo

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1.
Come on, now. Move away from now. You spend your life afraid. Claiming the treasures of your past a shameful masquerade. Everyone is understanding. As generous as they can be. Sympathize for me just one more time. There's a feather, There's a whether-not for me. Creature, now, You're in a feature now, A structure and a curse. Painting perversions in your mind. A masochist rehearsed. But everyone is masturbating in the recess of their home. But if you face the book and believe, There's a feather, there's a whether-not for me. I will not abide by you. I have never been unkind. Only when the hate is deserved. "Not everyone is such an asshole," I tell myself when you are holding me. But I see much clearer in your absence. There's a feather, There's a whether-not for me.
2.
I am not untouchable. I am just like you. Many times we've been out drinking with the full moon in our eyes. Now I stand before you thinking, "Is it wrong to tell a lie, howe'er you alter the design?" I hear the distant drum, but I can understand that I am not first one. Many times you've said, "I'm sorry," for ideals you had stood behind. Now I stand before you desperately. I wish I could change your mind, howe'er you falter, howe'er you alter the design.
3.
You believe you're sent to Earth with a blessing named from birth. There's a good will that drives you every day, until you've had your fill, but only you can choose your way. You're so graceful. You're sublime when all your begging boys are standing in a line. It pains me to see you, that I cannot undo. I know it's a hard way, but he will not take care of you. You child of no god I am joyous. I am clear. I get all bashful whenever you are near. The first time I looked at you your smile began to grey. There is no remedy. You will only fade away. And I won't be there to have my say. I'll be smiling down from up on high, and I'll curse your name until I die. You child of no god
4.
When I go away you're always on my mind. (And I won't return. I won't return.) For you are of myself, and I must hold you up. (I won't return. I won't return.) But if you hold my like you did, then I could love you like before. But in the quiet of my mind there's a voice I can't ignore, saying, "Look beyond the powdered room. Look beyond what you can see." There's a fire burning now, inside of you, inside of me. What I ask you for is what we all deserve (And I won't return. I won't return.) I have had enough. I've said all that I can. You don't even listen. But if you hold me like you did, then I would love you like before. But in the quiet of my mind there's a voice I can't ignore, saying, "Look at what's in front of you. Try to see what lies beneath." There's a fire burning now, inside of you, inside of me.

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Written 2013-2014. Recorded January-March 2014.

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released September 5, 2015

Music, lyrics, all instruments by Derek Spaldo

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Derek Spaldo Chicago, Illinois

Derek Spaldo is a Chicago-based musician and actor. Originally from Rutherford, NJ, Derek came up in the New York DIY art scene. He was a long-time multi-instrumentalist in the critically acclaimed band Garcia Peoples; with Garcia Peoples he had the pleasure of working with artists such as Chris Forsyth, PG Six, and Matt Sweeney. ... more

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